Abstract
Isotopic measurements provide valuable information about the origin of greenhouse gases - as carbon dioxide levels increase, there is a corresponding shift towards lighter isotopic composition similar to that of fossil fuels. Detecting such isotopic shifts, however, requires extremely precise measurements, which must also be globally reproducible in order to make reliable policy decisions. This feature article outlines the collective search for the ideal standard for carbon isotope measurements since the 1950s. This tragicomedy of errors, if you wish, has strengthened the reliability of today's measurements and has taken us from fictional oceans, to toilet seat marbles, and complex mathematical conventions that separate data from reliable results.